So life is ticking on as LO becomes more settled into her new family. Everyday I am greeted with a big smile from LO when I get her out of her cot. She makes me laugh and smile, and forget about all the trivial things that stress me out. She has given me so much joy and had ended years of yearning for me. For years I yearned for a career and then I yearned for a child. It isn’t like my career has been successful as such, it’s just that my priorities have changed over the years. When I was young, I wanted to ‘be’ something and spent years unsuccessfully chasing a career I thought I wanted. Years later, I changed tack and moved into an office job and then wanted a challenge so I got a more senior job which meant long hours and being on call at weekends and working for a maniac. After this stressful job, I realised that it doesn’t really matter any more. All I wanted is a job that I could leave at work and not work ridiculous hours, particularly as we were in the adoption process. So now LO is in our lives, my new priority is to enjoy being with her!
The weird thing is, that I wondered if I could stomach changing the nappy of a child who wasn’t biologically mine. I know it sounds stupid but it was a question rather than a concern. Of course, I could and I do it without blinking an eye (unless she’s done a really stinky one!) I also wondered if I could genuinely love a child who wasn’t biologically mine. Again, it’s a stupid thought and again, not a pressing one, but obviously I can. She is a wonder and gives me so much joy. There are so many little things that she does that make me happy. The other day, I came home and LO ran up to me at the front door and said ‘hi!’. It was the best way to be welcomed home.