Social services asked if we could meet the foster carers as to show LO that she wasn’t ‘abandoned’ by them. We arranged to meet the foster carers today and we were a bit worried about how it would go and how LO would react. I have read about other children’s experiences and how upset they became afterwards. This was for older children though but I still wondered if LO would somehow recognise them but wouldn’t be able to place them and how she would react after we had left. However, LO pulled it out of the bag again and she was great. We met in a mutual place – it is very important that it wasn’t in each other’s houses. We planned it so she would be asleep on the trains and that worked out perfectly as she was refreshed when we met. She was very happy to see them and was very comfortable being held by them. It was so cute to see her little face light up. We had lunch and she played with them and they were very happy to see her of course! It is lucky that we get on with them and we have agreed to keep in contact. We took some photos to add to her life story book.
What was nice about it was that she still knew who we were. When we left, LO was very happy and wasn’t upset at all. We got the train back and she slept most of the way and woke up happy again. She was, and is, a little star.
We took LO to sing along which is a free thing for little ones in our local library. Basically, there are lots of babies shaking maracas, tambourines, bells and parents singing along and doing the actions. We have been going for a while now and it is become really busy. There is one song in which you hoist your child up in the air at certain times of the song. It was very surreal seeing lots of babies and toddlers being held up in the air at the same time and then I thought if I find this surreal, how surreal does LO find this?? We are starting to recognise the same people though and hopefully will make some friends, particularly for my beloved as she is going to be on adoption leave.
What is really cute though is that LO doesn’t really sing along but she sings and moves her hands when she is in the buggy, on the way home. She is clearly processing everything she has experienced and seems to enjoy it so this is definitely going to be a regular thing.
It is strange to think that we wouldn’t have been party to this if we didn’t have LO. It is like some not-so-secret underground world of parenthood. Anyhow, singing together is a lovely, embracing sensation and it feels as if we are part of the community. I can now understand why religious groups and choirs sing together.
So after a lovely long time with our LO, I had to go back to work. I shouldn’t really complain as I’ve had a lot more time off than the usual 2 weeks that other people get, but I’ve really, really, really loved being with LO and my beloved. We woke up at 6am, got ready and got LO up at 6.30am so we could have 30 minutes for breakfast and a little play before I had to leave. It was so sad to say goodbye to my beautiful girls and I was missing them loads. I hurried home as soon as I could to give LO a bath and put her to bed. We got a routine going for the first week but LO was not happy about it. Apparently from the second day onwards, my beloved told me that LO didn’t want to be put down for her morning nap and got really distressed. She held her in her arms and she fell asleep. It could be because she was ill and teething but when I put her down to sleep on the Saturday, she moaned a little but settled herself, which suggests she was feeling a little anxious about being left.
After the first week of work, we had a lovely weekend together. Monday rolled on far too quickly and I was back at work again. When I got home, LO gave me a big smile and a hug. She then wanted to go back to my beloved which was fine but when we all sat down to play, I shook a rattle and she started to cry and to cling to my beloved. It broke my heart a little and I got a bit sad that she clung onto my beloved and didn’t want to be with me. However, we then played a game of her being walked into my arms and then being walked into my beloved’s arms for a big hug and kiss (a game she loves). We then sang a few of her favourite nursery rhymes in a circle but she was still a bit clingy. It made me feel a bit better when my beloved said that she has been out-of-sorts all day and it wasn’t just because of me. Poor little thing is still coughing at night due to a cold and so her sleep is being disturbed. She is also teething. So all things combined, it is understandable that she is a little clingy. I gave her a bath and we had some good times interacting with each other and pulling funny faces at each other. I put her to bed and she slept soundly. Here’s hoping we all get used to the new schedule.